Reflective

I have been in a weird mood the past couple days. I have had alot of thoughts about my life and where it is going. I worked really hard the past two years to get into a certain program, which I got an alternate seat in. The program started in Agust and I did not get a seat. I have since decided to go to school to become an ARNP. I am looking at about 4 years of school. I really need to do this to be able to provide for my kids.

Here is were the trying part comes in. My kids need me now just as much as they are going ot need me in hte future. I am a good mom and do more fr my kids even with work and school than most of the people I know. But somehow I feel like I am depriving my kids when I am at school. I am not sure why this is all coming about right now other than I am going to lots of different schools to see about the different program and maybe it is getting to me.

I am not looking to start a stay at home mom verses working mom debate because believe me I have done both and they are equally as hard and both have pros and cons. I guess I am just putting something in words that has been bouncing around my head for a few weeks. Not sure what I am looking for.